Here you will be introduced to Eff, Att, and Rew.
Who are we? Where are we? Why are we addicted to
Tecmo? Do we like monkeys? All that will be answered
here...well except the monkeys part (or WILL it?).
Effer - a.k.a Jeff "Over the" Hill "And through the woods"
- Age: 25
- Height: 6'0 1/2"
- Weight: I'm on the juice.
- Nationality: I'm a monkey!
- Favorite team(s): F**kin' 49ers!
- Nicknames: Eff, Effer, Effage, Eff El Fattidor, Jeffers, Salguod Yerffej, Jackjif, Chris Haaaaaaaaaaaansen
- From: Las Vegas, Nv
- Current Residence: Sacramento, Ca
Well here I am. The one
who started it all. They call me Eff. I was born in Las
Vegas but moved to Sacramento when I was 4. I'm sure you're
wondering what's with the nicknames. Well, it started a long time
ago in a chat room (wow, I forgot those exist) when I accidentally
typo'd
"Att" instead of "Matt." Well, Matt and an old buddy Greg (who
was Reg but I haven't talked to him for ages) made fun of me and called
me Eff. So I'm sure you see the pattern. Matthew/Matt/Att,
Jeffrey/Jeff/Eff, Gregory/Greg/Reg and Andrew/Drew/Rew. So yeah,
that's us, but Greg's not involved in all of this. As for me
being a Tecmoer, I've been playing this game since the year of it's
release, and it is my all-time favorite sports game. I was really good
when I was a kid, but when these records were first tracked it was
clearly rough around the edges. However, a quick look at my more
recent seasons and you will see I have returned to form and become
better than ever. If you ask Matt and Andrew, I'm known for my
"Heart Attack" games. I'm sure you can figure out what
that means. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed all this (or
do I?) (is it?) (we'll see).
~Eff~
Atter - a.k.a Matt "Behind" Barzano
- Age: 27
- Height: 5'11
- Weight: 0.0985683 ounces
- Nationality: I'm Batman.
- Favorite team(s): Daaaaaaa Bears!
- Nicknames: I'm King Jaaaasper (Att, Atter, Matty McFatty)
- From: Chicago, Illinois
- Current Residence: Chesapeake, Virginia
Unfortunately, the man they call Att lives on the opposite
side of the country as I (Actually, thinking back to the discussions
Matt and I shared regarding "what-if-we-were-neighbors," I believe our
distance is fortunate for the rest of the world). He was originally
from Illinois but
has since moved to Virginia. Back in the infancy of this site I had to
re-addict Att to his all-time favorite sports game, but since then he has become a highly efficient
Tecmoer. He holds a large amount of records considering the infrequency
of his play. Between the three of us, Att has the best career winning
percentage and is especially adept at winning in the playoffs. If he
played as many seasons as me, I would have to kill him. On a
semi-serious note, Matt is a
funny guy and a good friend, but he is known for his disappearing acts.
Months at a time! You can count on him to
consistently and randomly disappear, and then re-appear. He's Batman.
Rewer - a.k.a Andrew "Blackface" Klisch
- Age: 22
- Height: 5'6
- Weight: 5289 Ibs in a magnifying glass
- Nationality: White + White x White squared = Andrew
- Favorite team(s): 49ers
- Nicknames: Rew, Rewer, Fatty McDrewgal, Salguod Werdna
- From: Fairfield, Ca
- Current Residence: Colorado Springs, Co
Rew is my cousin who needs to lose weight. I mean he's so
massively fat you'de
think he was a whale and not a person! Between the three of us, he is
considered the "n00b" of Tecmo. He was born here in California
(Fairfield) but moved to Colorado with his mom until 2001, when he
moved back here to live with his dad. Since then, he has moved back
and forth several times. He's currently in Colorado with his Mom. Rew
always
loved Tecmo, but is far less experienced in the game than Att and I
(with our old
asses). He's the rookie, n00b, youngin, etc. etc. He has
improved his play and has learned some tricks to the game of TSB, but
he
still has a lot to learn. He is definitely better than when he first
joined us, and has enjoyed his first 16-0 season. When Tecmoing in
Colorado, he sends me e-mails with screen shots, much like Atter. Rew's
"Tecmo training" is on hold since he isn't here in Cali, and we really
miss him.
Our Favorite Tecmo Achievements
Eff's Favorite Tecmo Achievements
-
Gen I Steelers defense. First team to have
under 1000 yards in both rushing and passing defense. Total
Passing Defense: 983 yards(former record). Total Rushing Defense:
925 yards(former record). Total Defense: 1908 yards(former
record).
-
Gen I New York Giants. Shattered multiple team
records including Points Forwarded (851) and Against (67), Passing
Defense (617), Rushing Defense (848) and Total Defense
(1465). First team to break 800 points and allow less than
100. After 8 games, NYG had 43 points against. They
gave up 24 points the next week against PHI, and that put them at 67
against. The final 7 regular season games were all shutouts as
well as the Divisional playoff. The team was so dominant in the
NFC playoffs, against the 49ers in the NFC Championship, Eff brought in
all the backups to prevent injury. They went on to win a dramatic Superbowl over the Bills 10-9. The team also won a record
setting game 78-0 over the Cowboys. Other minor records were
accomplished as well.
- Gen
III 49ers: Finally got over the hump and won the SB with the Niners. No
idea how I hadn't. Also, this team was truly dominant, only giving up
44 points all season (at that time, shattering the old record) to go
with their always prolific offense.
- Gen III Steelers: A truly magnificent defensive season, giving up only 39 points and shattering
the rushing defense record by roughly 300 yards. The total defense was
1544 yards, within 80 yards of our record. Also, in two of the games
this season (Buffalo and Houston) I had given up two touchdowns for a
combined total of 27 of the 39 points allowed. That leaves an insane
combined total of 12 points allowed in the other 14 games played.
Superbowl Highlights (Gen I)
-
Made small comeback as Chiefs to force Overtime
against the 49ers. 49ers onside kicked and got possession at the
overtime kickoff but eff stopped the 49ers cold as Cofer missed a 56
yard FG. Eff went on to kick a game winning 68 yard FG with Nick
Lowery.
-
Made clutch comeback with Dolphins to defeat
Bears. Down 14-10 in the 4th qrt, Eff safetied the Bears to make
it 14-12. The ball went back and forth for a while and then Eff
had a last chance. Within his own 20 yard line with 30+ seconds
left, he squeezes to midfield and with the clock running calls FG with
4 seconds left. Rew watching...the snap...right on the bottom on
the top hash mark....ball sails through and Eff and Rew celebrate Eff's
SB win.
-
Won SB during his Packers season over Rew's
Dolphins. Great competition for the receiving yards record as Eff squeezed by to win 2625 yds (Sharpe) to 2615 yds (Clayton).
-
With the hated Atlanta Falcons, Eff goes 15-1 and
gets by the 49ers in the NFC Championship. In the SB, the game
was tied at 10-10 and Eff had the ball with about 2 and a half minutes
left. On a 3rd down around midfield, Eff runs up but the Dolphins
read the play and blitz. With super juker moves, Eff somehow gets
Rozier to skiddle his way up the sideline and then starts juking like a
crackhead, turning a busted play into a huge 50 yard gain deep into MIA
territory. He follows with a TD and gives Marino about a minute
to score. On a 4th down in their own territory, Marino bootlegs
up. With his insane, excellent conditioned Deion Sanders, Eff does
his typical slash to run through the line leaving Clayton open
because Eff will get the sack. Eff miss-guides Sanders and
gets knocked to the ground by the grappling line. Marino nails
Clayton who struts into the endzone with no time remaining. Eff
is thinking "block the kick" only, and grabs Deion, blazes in and
rejects the extra point. Eff goes wild as he wins his 10th Tecmo
Superbowl.
-
The New York Giants go into Superbowl XXVIII, Eff's
final "Generation One" game, with supreme confidence and
momentum. Going into this game Eff has 43 straight wins, 18 by
these Giants, and complete dominance in recent games. Dave Meggett returns from his 4th injury of the season (2 regular season
injuries, 2 post season). For the Bills, Thurman Thomas
returned. Things quickly fall apart for Eff. On the opening
drive, Phil Simms (brilliant year, close to as good as Att's with him)
gets blitzed by the Bills. Usually Eff gets the throw to an open
receiver, but they got through so quickly that they grabbed him and
then a LB dove and drilled him for the sack. Immediately following
the hit, the injury scene and music hits, and Eff's jaw drops to the
floor in shock. Jeff Hostetler has to "Phil" in with his 31
PC. Luckily he is mobile with 25 MS, so if nobody is open, he can
get good yardage by foot. He threw some very inaccurate
passes as expected, so Eff was very careful. Eff was on his toes,
preventing the Bills from scoring a touchdown (2 goal line stands ending
as FG's and another FG because of halftime approaching). With
less than 3 minutes remaining in the game, it's 9-3 Bills. Eff
drives toward midfield and finds a WR wide open. Things continue
to flop as Hostetler throws a dead duck behind the receiver and it's
picked off. With now less than 2 minutes left, Eff needs a quick
3 and out, and LT makes sure that happens with the quickness.
Meggett gets the punt deep into his territory and bolts, shaking
everyone with less than a minute left. He ends up needing to beat
only a guy or two but gets hit around midfield. Less than 30
seconds left, Eff praying for an open WR down field. He gets
it. Baker (top WR, swapped) is streaking all alone up the
sideline. Hostetler runs up, pauses, plants, Eff praying he
throws it in bounds, and guns it. The ball sails high in the air in bounds and Baker leaps in the air landing in the end zone with 2
seconds left. Eff wins 10-9.
Att's Favorite Tecmo Achievementsn/a
Superbowl Highlights
n/a
Rew's Favorite Tecmo Achievements
n/a
Superbowl Highlights
In a low scoring game, Rew's Giants are losing 13-7 vs.
Oilers with less than 10 seconds left. He has the ball on his own
25 yard line. He obviously has to call a long pass play, and he
does. After the snap, we both notice an open receiver, Rew scrambles
up, and than launches a bomb to a wide open Ingram who leaps for it at
the Oilers 10 yard line and scoots his way into the end zone.
Obviously the recent blocked extra point was huge as Andrew makes his,
and wins a clutch Superbowl 14-13 on the last play of the game.
Unfortunately, I forgot to inform him that I wanted to start recording
all of our Superbowls. Therefor, it was not captured on tape.
However, he did move on to have a somewhat close and clutch victory
(recorded) in his next season with the Bengals. (15-4 overall)